There is a term in the seduction community known as plea. They say that it is bad to do something good for someone. They have defined it as paying a girl a compliment, buying her a drink, inviting her to dinner, you get an idea.
The definition of supplication
To “beg” to someone is to show deference or subservient behavior in the hope of receiving something in return for that person (ie, acting as a “supplicant”). The supplication is usually made by someone who is hoping to increase their chances of meeting someone. Ironically, pleading has the opposite effect, because it sub-communicates lower social value and insecurity, leading the woman to think that the boy is trying to kiss her butt or even manipulate her. Pleading usually involves (a) giving a woman some kind of unrequited special treatment or (b) placing yourself in a position of lesser social value in relation to her in order to “reward” him with something.
Common examples include:
or doing something nice for her
or react passively to the situation
or bribe her to give you what you want
o She is making the decisions
o Inappropriate for the situation (i.e. buying her a trip to Paris without sleeping with her)
“Anti-plea”
or doing something nice for her
or actively control the situation
or reward her for giving you what you want
or are you making the decisions
o Appropriate for the situation (i.e. buying her a game of pool on the first date)
I’ve been thinking about this a bit. Supplication is when you do something nice for someone at their suggestion and you want approval in return. In other words, you are reacting to its frame. For example, if she asks you to buy her a drink and you do, then that is a plea.
On the other hand, doing something nice for her at your own discretion is not a plea, because now you are playing in your frame. She asks you to invite her to drink and you rethink: “give me a kiss.” She kisses you. Well now she’s playing by your rules … it’s perfectly fine to buy her a drink! After all, you are a man of integrity, right?
The attitude behind what you are doing is what really matters with supplication. Are you doing something like a real gift without expecting anything in return?
Are you giving and expecting something in exchange for this? Looking for some kind of approval.
It is the framework that you come from that is really important.
Think of Brad Pitt. Looking for approval? Would it matter if he met a girl in a bar and in 5 minutes bought her a drink? No, because he has a strong body. Get that strong frame and then the pleading community term won’t matter.