Hello Folks! Welcome to Our Blog.

For parents of minor children who want to know what ALL the options are when thinking about divorce, listen up. A mind works best, like a parachute, when it is open. There are very creative ways to divide the property and share the children if both parties keep an eye on the prize: the well-being of the children. They didn’t ask for this drama and it’s possible to protect them if you two work on it. The idea of ​​”working on it” may sound strange to a couple who are about to break up just because their relationship doesn’t “work out,” but if they have children together, their work will never end. There will be weddings and grandchildren and vacations for the rest of your life. If World War III begins now, with the children caught in the middle, they will have to do a lot to duck and cover as their verbal bullets go over their heads.

Take a step back and focus on the children. No matter what perceived mistakes have happened to you or not, this is where you are right now and playing the blame game may make you feel better, but it is not productive. A little rational thinking instead of playing the victim of your own feelings is what is most needed right now. The more you focus on anger, the more anger you will feel. Instead, focus on the kids now. Who has been the main caregiver? If you’ve been a stay-at-home mom or dad, guess what, you’ll probably have to go back to work because you won’t get enough support to continue living the life you’ve become used to. So if both of you are working, then you really have a chance to see a joint custody situation. It is difficult to raise a child alone. Sometimes you really need a break for your own good.

5/2 2/5. This is a very popular child exchange plan that gives children a reliable consistency. One parent always drinks on Mondays and Tuesdays, while the other parent always drinks on Wednesdays and Thursdays with weekends coming and going. This means that you will never be away from the child for more than 5 days in a row. Sometimes the weekend runs through Monday / Tuesday and other times through Wednesday / Thursday. Having a great deal of time with and without children allows you to plan a personal and work life that many people enjoy.

Financially, if you have a self-employed, bitter, and uncooperative spouse, try collecting child support. It is impossible unless they feel like paying you. This will be a fight to the finish and you will probably never collect what is owed to you. The last thing you want is to go to war with such a person. So now we talk about the most important decision you will make. What kind of divorce do you want? Some people want to go with flaming guns. There are MANY attorneys who simply love clients like this because they know they can make a lot of money off you. But if you have a self-employed spouse, you NEED your cooperation. You know what your grandmother used to say about catching more flies with honey. A lengthy, costly, and adversarial divorce will not produce a viable outcome when the party owning support is a self-employed person. They will dig into their cures and do so much creative accounting that you’ll end up paying them.

We create our lives from our intention. That may sound counterintuitive. You didn’t intend for your marriage to end, did you? Well intention is like a muscle, the more you use it, the stronger it becomes. If the two of you intend to break away from as much cooperation and generosity as possible, BOTH will be better off, financially and emotionally. I always say the same thing to people, you can divide the cake in two or four ways. How do you get more? When you use divorce mediation, you eliminate lawyers. Average fees in California, when both parties have their own attorneys, is $ 20,000 each, but the truth is that the more you have to lose, the higher your fees. California divorce attorneys are the only type of attorney whose fees are protected by the equity in your home. They know they are being paid. Do you think the case will take longer or will it resolve itself when you have a lot of assets? Human nature being what it is, certain attorneys will make sure the case is not resolved until there is nothing left to fight for. For more details, read The Bleak House by Charles Dickens. Nothing has changed since the 19th century.

The vast majority of people know what they have. There are no hidden Swiss bank accounts in most divorce cases, however lawyers will spend thousands of dollars taking evidence, taking statements, and serving subpoenas. Why buy more than you need? Would you do that with a house or a car? Why would you do it with a divorce? I’m not saying mediation is for everyone, but if the two of you are decent people who just want out, no one is trying to hurt the other and you are both honest and trustworthy about money with enough honor to keep your word, then you are the client. perfect for mediation.

Divorce is a transition that has its challenges, but an experienced mediator will help you in a peaceful and respectful way for both of you. Mediation prices are determined by experience and where you are, so make multiple calls, interview multiple mediators to make sure you are fully informed. In my own practice, the whole process, on average, takes 4-7 hours, but there are certain tasks that need to be done before working with me. Ask the mediator what percentage of their cases are resolved and how many meetings were necessary. In California, the average cost when both parties have their own attorney is $ 40,000, so what the mediator charges will be a small fraction of that. The financial benefits of mediation are obvious, but more importantly, you will be comfortable enough with your spouse to parent your children. This is the best gift you can give your children. I should know, I was one of those kids caught in the middle. That is why I do what I do. Using mediation instead of litigation brings some sanity back to the divorce process because the adversarial system destroys families. So ask yourself, what kind of divorce do you want? Peaceful divorce is an idea whose time has come.

Leave a Reply

Recent Comments