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Is there a magical mystical place or time when you must draw your line in the sand with your unfaithful husband? It would be so much easier if there was a one-size-fits-all solution to help you deal with your cheating husband and save your marriage. However, there are some questions you can ask after discovering that your husband has cheated on you that will help you identify the correct line in the sand for your marriage.

  1. Do you think your husband has only done it once and will never do it again? Cheating sometimes occurs for a mere matter of convenience. It’s easier to believe it’s a one-time deal if he comes to you with the confession rather than you finding out on your own.
  2. Was it a long-term issue? This question, if the answer is yes, often leads to many other questions. Is the matter over? Was there something she was getting from the other relationship that you just can’t give her? Do you think you will have this type of relationship again during the course of your marriage? Can you live with the knowledge of the previous matter or the fear of a future matter?
  3. Is this becoming a bad habit in your marriage? If your husband has cheated on you multiple times and continues to apologize one time and runs off to do it again the next time, then you need to carefully examine why you keep forgiving him and how long you are willing to live this way.
  4. Are you still emotionally involved with the marriage right now? This is often the ultimate line in the sand. Once you have withdrawn your emotional investment, there really is nothing left on which to build the next stage of your marriage.
  5. Has he taken responsibility for his actions without trying to blame you? This is a great question to ask yourself before drawing your line in the sand. If he’s trying to blame you for his actions, it’s time to start asking yourself some tough questions about whether your future is better served alone than it is in your current marriage.
  6. Are you beginning to believe that you deserve this behavior from him? It’s one thing to accept that you may have contributed to an affair by not meeting certain needs within your marriage. Another thing is to accept the guilt that does not belong to you. Ultimately, it is he who cheated and that responsibility is his and his alone.

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