Be quiet. If I didn’t say anything else, we all know that the word silence has been used for generations to inflict power, subjugation, pain, submission, and tears. It has burned the darkest corners of our minds, where our deepest secrets lie; the ones we have dragged through the mud and mire of adulthood and labeled with names of rejection, unworthiness, and unloved. Why do we keep licking our tattered wounds and guarding them like a wounded pet, whose eyes beg for compassion? We continually surround ourselves with family, relationships and bosses, who perpetuate the same interpersonal relationship dynamics, feeding the same wound that causes so much pain. We do this because it has become our comfort zone. It is when we learn new tools through counseling, self-help, support groups, God, books, art therapy, therapy, music, healthy boundaries, in our new jobs and in our new relationships that we will grow and develop the skills we need. We must become a complete us, before joining together to congratulate someone else. For future generations, at some point, we have to take responsibility for seeking the help we need to heal, so as not to repeat another multigenerational epidemic of sexual assault. The victims were chosen by their perpetrators, but now they have a lot of emotional damage to overcome.
So how did the sexual assault of children become such an acceptable occurrence for a prosperous and progressive culture that thrives on its deeply ingrained traditions and legacies? Generations of families before us knew sexual assault, it was a taboo subject. It was not reported because it was a family affair. The children felt they had no one to report to, no place to go. Rape and incest have flourished and flourished through the bloodlines since children have been born from one year to the next. I know that my abuser told me that he would kill me, my mother and the rest of my family if I told him; And I knew I was very capable I was eleven years old. He also knew it was hereditary. My mother seemed to favor the attention of men, more than that of her children. I like many children before me, I had nowhere to turn and no one to tell.
We see today’s generation of women, from Olympic gymnasts and swimmers, to actors and actresses standing up courageously, speaking their truth, boldly, bravely and sharing their pain. The pain shared by a multitude of women, boys and girls, who preceded them; who had no voice. The voices of thousands of generations, struggling to have a voice today! We are the voice of those whose pain was so great that they could no longer bear it. That they waited so long for someone to help them; listen; to believe them. We are the battle cry behind their unheard-of voices; raising our voices in unison for them, yelling “NO MORE SILENCE!”
We stand together as a society today, so that the thought of the draconian era is gone! We will all have to change; and it won’t be easy. It won’t be nice. It is vitally important that everyone survive; or we will be inundated through the courts and penal system with lawsuits and imprisonment for those who choose to continue committing these heinous crimes against women and children. We can get involved with our local sexual assault and human trafficking advocacy groups and mentor groups. We need to change the laws, CPS, the criminal justice system and mental health systems, to provide the quality resources that survivors of sexual assault and trauma deserve. Today, we are like the old generation and the new generation united! We are fighting the Last Great Frontier known as “Sexual Assault”! We will defend silence no more! Together we can make our children’s future a great place to live! TOGETHER WE ARE!
Connie Lee: 08/02/2018
